a note from the doctor

I went to my doctor a couple of weeks back to get an all around check-up. I figured it was time since I cannot remember my last physical and I also had some things I wanted to discuss with him. Among these, I wanted to know what is causing the most incredible headaches I have ever experienced in my life!!

A few looks in my eyes and ears followed by questions w/ some yes's and no's from me and the doctor gives a what he called a preliminary diagnosis of migraines. I would've much rather he just waved his magic stethoscope and pronounced my headaches Gone Forever - what else are they learning in all those years of medical school if not how to magically make me feel better on demand?!

He also ordered at CT scan, "just to check", since I have never experienced headaches like this before. Even though the whole idea of getting my head x-rayed completely freaked me out, I obediently went that appointment the following week.

I arrived home today and find a note in the mail from my doctor. It reads "Dear patient, Your CT scan is normal. The headaches are most likely just migraines as we previously discussed. Sincerely, Doctor Man." Um, yeah. I have a couple of problems with that: 1) where is the sympathy for my pain and my lollipop for being such a good patient? 2) 'most likely' does not sound like a very sound diagnosis to me, and most importantly, 3) 'just migraines' ....WHAT?! Obviously said by someone who has never experienced a migraine before because if you have ever had one you would never ever put the word 'just' in front.

These headaches are 'just' the most excruciating pain I have felt in my life - outside of labor- but at least I got something really cool at the end of that! These most likely migraines give me nothing but pain, force me to bed, and make me very lonely because in the middle of it all I really do need to be left completely alone to suffer through it - light and sound only make it worse. It is as if the monkeys in my head are using ice picks, sledge hammers, jack hammers, regular hammers, clubs, tooth picks, shovels, hatchets, drills and dynamite to hack their way out of my skull. It looks like my mom was right all these years when she told me I was being thick headed about things because the monkeys have yet to escape!